My guess is that most people who choose a specific education out of high school hope to be able to use that education in the future. Otherwise, what would the point be in persevering to learn? Really, to learn is to change. If we cannot act upon something we have learned it seems likely the learning will be lost.
So you can imagine my delight to discover that the nine months I spent intensively studying the Bible is already starting to impact my outward life….
Of course I felt like I was being transformed during the study because it was hard work and regularly painful. (It was also inwardly rewarding- I don’t want to mislead you into thinking it was torture.)
After graduating in December there was Christmas and then there was a month in Colorado preparing to come back to Washington for a month. During that month of preparing I did have a glimpse of God going before me, but I mostly walked around a little worried that nothing had changed. I could not picture how the inward changes would manifest themselves in a place (Washington) where I had formed some solid habits.
The main habits I had formed can be summed up by the word inertia.
A tendency to do nothing or to remain unchanged
I don’t have to expound on this too much, do I? Good, because I want to move on to what is really happening.
Antonyms: activity, animation, life, liveliness, moving
By now I have had many conversations with many people at home and what I’m discovering is that what I learned in the Bible last year is all in my head and heart.
Being home I have a chance to see both the struggles and the victories up close in a way that just doesn’t happen while I’m in Colorado. I saw the struggles first and had two days of feeling really sad and overwhelmed. But going along with those words up there- the antonyms to inertia- God keeps moving me forward. Alive, I wake up in the morning even when I feel too tired to take on the day.
Even when I do not ask for God’s grace he is giving it but when I ask for it, then I recognize each place where it is given.
Then, before my eyes, he shows me all of the ways he is working in the lives of my friends and family. It fuels my future prayers with trust and grateful anticipation.
This post seems a bit vague… but there are so many specifics that I don’t know how to add them in a clear and clever way. Maybe you should call me and we can talk about it all.