Solitude is a good thing, right? I think so. I think it’s possible to find solitude when I am not alone but what happens when I’m alone is the interesting thing because it seems to happen so rarely.
There is always the possibility, in this alone kind of solitude that things will turn south towards loneliness. Is this the point when you know you should reach out to others? What if it’s the middle of the night and you just can’t sleep?
Last night I was in this very situation….. Here is what I did. I put on a movie (Pride and Prejudice)
no images were foundI have seen so many times that I can either sit there and speak the lines along with the actors, or I can leave the movie running while I go take care of the laundry. This is not actually normal for me… Normally if the tv is on I am watching it and if I am not watching it, I turn it off. But last night I thought I’d try the old trick several of my friends employ of letting the tv keep me company. It was comical to me. I cleaned my cameras (they were really dusty), wrote lists, did ankle exercises and talked back to the movie when things got really dramatic.
I was also kind of trying to “listen” last night.
no images were foundI don’t know if that makes sense with the voices on the tv talking but sometimes I need noise or movement that doesn’t need my brain engaged to help me coax my wandering thoughts back in from the wilderness. Balancing along the fence between solitude and loneliness I managed to slip into both a few times and also managed to coax a few good thoughts back inside.
I might have chosen the wrong movie to help me keep me company and ease into sleep since this particular movie is, like, 6 hours long but I had a lot of fun mimicking accents and saying “Oh, Mr. Collins!” I had never noticed before just how many awkward moments are in that movie…. like The Office in fancy clothes.
So that was last night. Not incredibly profound stuff. But I wonder what do you do when you have time alone? Do you find it productive or do you fear the silence and space?
Edit: Two friends shared this with me, so I will now share with you…